Friday, 28 August 2015

In Which I Start Breaking the News



So, picture the scene.

It's a Monday evening. I'm still at work. Yes, until 9pm. After arriving at 9am. Things are bleak.

Then *ping* (not really, my phone is permanently on silent, more like *flash*) and up pops an email.

Oh, it's from my new job people.

They want me to start on the 5th of October.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

So, the rest of this week has been a bit of a blur of 'omg how do I sort everything out in 5 weeks? I need a FLAT. I need to hand my notice in. Oh God I need to get those boots fixed that I pulled the zip off about 18 months ago'.

5 weeks might seem like a long time, but oh my god it is not.

And my dad clearly sent a group text out within about 12 seconds of me telling him the news, because I received a sudden surge of 'wooo well done' texts from family members. Thanks, Dad.

So, in no particular order, I have begun tacking -


  • Throwing out clothes that I don't wear. To make room for new ones obv. This is deciding whether they're ebay-able, charity shopable, clothes bankable, binable etc etc.
  • Buying the new clothes. Cue trip to Meadowhall in T-12 hours. I need a coat. I need shoes. I need some smart trousers. And just new everything in general.
  • Getting my tablet screen fixed. I stood on it about 2 years ago. It's time. £67 pounds down and the UPS guy came and collected it from my office. My colleague asked what I was doing, I explained, 'Oh, but couldn't you have just bought a new one off eBay for that?!' Shh. No.
  • Getting my KG boots fixed. They were probably under warranty when I first ripped the zip off. That was again, about a year ago. Now it means asking round cobblers' to see whether that's something they do. (Is it??)
  • FINDING A FLAT. This is taking up far too much of my time at the moment. I'm sending Sarah 800 links a minute which she definitely doesn't have time to click on. But frustratingly, they're all either available right now, or they get let before I could ever get there to view them. I called about one today that had been up for 54 MINUTES. Nope. Gone. And then the guy went on a 14 minute sales pitch without taking a single breath about every single other property they have on offer before I could get a word in to be like 'yeh.. thanks.. I'm at work so.. bye'. Current plan is to drive down the weekend before, schedule 7 million viewings. And pounce.
  • Trying to shop myself buying homewear. This is by far the most difficult task. WORLD MAP PRINT BUNTING!! No. You don't even have walls yet. Stop it.
  • Getting my roots done. Oh god, when am I even free to fit that 10 hour trip in.
  • Seeing all my favourites before I leave. This sucks. Two of my best friends in the world are here and I am going to miss them so so so so much. This is soppy and silly but WAAAAH. 
  • Trying not to be a fat whale. 'Treat yoself/new job' chocolate is acceptable ONCE. Not every day. I don't really need the extra expense of having to buy new clothes AGAIN in two weeks when I go back up a clothing size. Take me back to the motivated me of two months ago, plz.
  • Handing in my notice. That one's been done. It's not something I've ever done before, and it's actually pretty nerve wracking. I hate letting people down and all my files will have to be reallocated to other members of the team, which makes me feel bad. Does everyone feel like this when quitting a job, or am I just ridiculous? Like 'ooh, I don't want to put them out, I'd better just stay here forever and rot in misery so that other people stay happy'. But it's done. Noone seems to have taken it personally. And I'm now on the wind down. 4 weeks to go, and one of those I'd already booked annual leave in for anyway.
  • Packing. I need boxes. Where do you get boxes from? EBay? Your dad? My dad can source me some boxes. That's dad work.
So. That's all the word vomit I have right now.

It's going to take a lot of coffee, and a lot of office cake. But the end is in sight.
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